危言聳聽

爲了加更多的幽默,我會用英語來給大家講話。

I thought of this as I was not studying, since my life can now be divided into two mutually exclusive events, studying and not, therefor had some time to think to myself. This would be a perfect story to tell around a campfire with a bunch of 8-12 year old boys, since they being the most stereotyped into enjoying this kind of pastime, but one told by Chinese people in Chinese to Chinese while camping in China. This will most likely be esoteric, however all humor is subjective anyway.

Our story unfolds much like many of the forgettable horror movies pumped out in the past decade; our main character (dad) and his family have recently moved into a 大雜院,his neighbors seem friendly enough, he’s received positive reviews about the school his kids’ll be attending, so on. After a fashion (and some lame exposition) he comes to find that the previous tenants had been sent to the fields for some reeducation through labor, the father having been found out to be a political dissident and capitalist sympathizer. After, the family starts to notice weird things, like the stove being turned on despite no one doing it (we’ll just blame the kids), or the bike tires all being flat, or the dad starting to sleepwalk at night.

Eventually, once the instances of sleepwalking continue to increase in frequency, the dad hires a specialist to come in and inspect, to see if there’s any ghost activity.  He comes in and immediately after he starts his inspection he freaks out and bolts. This worries the mom, who then starts to pressure the dad into finding a new apartment to move into, I mean it’s 2014 for Pete’s sake!  But the dad is in between a rock and a hard place, his income isn’t high enough to get an apartment, so they’re stuck in the 大雜院 for a time. Then, one dark night, the dad starts to sleepwalk. He stealthily creeps like the wind without sound into his son’s room, who’s sleeping on a bed like a green meadow, the dad leans over the son, the son wakes up because he can subconsciously sense someone there, looks at his dad, he can tell something’s wrong with dad, his dad leans even closer, locking eyes with his son, and whispers, “上課!”

謝謝收看

Advertisements

One thought on “危言聳聽

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s